It’s no secret that divorce can be an emotionally difficult experience. After all, most people going through this process are harboring feelings of betrayal or believe that they deserve better from an inconsiderate spouse. While these feelings are (in most cases) genuine, this mindstate is not particularly promising in the midst of a divorce.

Emotional pain can cloud one’s judgment and create vulnerabilities that can leave you in a terrible state even after the divorce is finalized. Actress Jada Pinkett-Smith, posted a poignant message for a friend who was going through a divorce, and her advice could be an inspiration for everyone who is enduring a split.

Essentially, Pinkett-Smith explained that the painful truth of life (and life during a divorce) is that we are not entitled to anyone’s kindness or consideration. People may provide these things because they want to, not because they are obligated to. So when a person is ugly or difficult during a divorce, this unfortunately is something that is to be expected. To counteract this, Pinkett-Smith urged her friend to focus on her own survival; both physically and mentally. Continually complaining about how your ex is making life (or the divorce) difficult is a substantial energy drain, and it prevents you from taking positive steps to better your situation. With that, focusing on what you can do differently, and making the best of your own resources is a better path to be on rather than being down in the dumps.

By empowering yourself, you may be amazed with that you can accomplish.

Source: HuffingtonPost.com, Jada Pinkett Smith’s divorce advice shared on her Facebook page, August 20, 2013