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How can I help my children adjust to my divorce?

On Behalf of | May 15, 2020 | Divorce |

When you file for divorce, you’re changing not only your life – but the life of your children as well. Divorce for parents can be even more emotional and challenging because of how all the changes will affect their kids. For parents, it’s crucial to offer children as much comfort and stability in a challenging time.

You can help your children through divorce by taking a few essential steps:

  • Tell your kids you love them. Reassure your kids that divorce is not their fault and remind them that both you and your ex love them. As everyone struggles with life after divorce, make it clear to your kids that your love for them is genuine.
  • Build familiar routines. Children can feel safe with regular schedules. Creating a parenting plan that allows you and your ex to help your kids become familiar with visitation and custody arrangements can help them adapt more quickly to the new situation. Even simple daily routines such as having dinner together or reading a book before bed can help kids feel more comfortable.
  • Don’t fight in front of the kids. If you and your ex have a contentious relationship, keep your arguments behind closed doors. Fighting where your kids can see can only disrupt any progress you make in helping them adjust and grow comfortable with your separation. Plus, it can facilitate your kids having to choose sides, which can complicate your relationship with your ex and your children.
  • Encourage communication. Divorce can make everyone vulnerable and emotional, especially children. Make sure to tell them that they can talk to you about their feelings and make sure that you listen. Allowing children to voice out their worries can help them feel heard during a stressful time.
  • Be flexible. Going through a divorce is like uncharted territory. No matter how you plan and prepare, things won’t always go the way you expect. It’s essential to stay open and willing to change so you can make necessary adjustments along the way and help your children adapt as well.

Divorce can be a rough experience for children. Parents must do what they can to ease children through the aftermath. By remembering these tips, you can help your children cope with the separation and learn to accept the situation. Together, you can move onward to a new and happy chapter in your lives.